Dear Reader,
On the Yahoo! homepage right now is a box that says, "Trending Now" which is self-explanatory. Numero uno on that list is "Free Lindsay".
A-a-a-hem.
FUCK THAT STUPID CUNT. LEAVE HER IN PRISON. SHE'S GUILTY. AS A MATTER OF FACT, LET HER ROT THERE ALONG AMERICA'S INFATUATION WITH HER. ACCORDING TO WIKIPEDIA, SHE'S AN ACTRESS (NEVER SAW HER IN ANYTHING GOOD) A SINGER (ANOTHER ACTRESS/ACTOR SINGER?-{THROWS UP}) AND A MODEL (A MODEL WHAT). DO WE REALLY GIVE A SHIT ABOUT THIS WOMAN ENOUGH THAT PEOPLE ARE GOING TO PROTEST HER PRISON SENTENCE DEMANDING HER EARLY RELEASE? FUCKING PLEASE. WE ARE AT WAR, THE ECONOMY IS STILL TAKING A MASSIVE SHIT, BP HAS TOTALLY FUCKED THE ECOSYSTEM OFF THE COAST OF NEW ORLEANS, AND LINDSAY LOHAN, FUCKING WHITE TRASH, UGLY LINDSAY LOHAN NEEDS TO BE RELEASED FROM JAIL. FUCK THAT DUMB CUNT.
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
Saturday, July 24, 2010
Twenty one and a half or proof of South Park being the Supreme ruler of all modern comedy.
I AM GOING TO PROVE ONCE AND FOR ALL THAT THE COMEDY OF SOUTH PARK REACHES WHAT NO OTHER SHOW CAN, INCLUDING THE SIMPSONS, AND FAMILY GUY, DO.
IN THIS EPISODE WE FIND SCOTT TENORMAN, AN EIGHT GRADER, TRICKING CARTMAN OUT OF HIS MONEY, OUTSMARTING HIM, TO WHERE CARTMAN BECOMES SO ENRAGED HE VOWS REVENGE. SCOTT FIRST HUSTLES CARTMAN OUT TEN DOLLARS,BY SELLING HIM PUBIC HAIR, THEN ANOTHER SIX DOLLARS AND SOME ODD CENTS, THEN SENDS HIM ON A BUS RIDE, THEN FOILS EVERY ATTEMPT CARTMAN MAKES TO GET EVEN. OF COURSE, IT WOULD BE BETTER FOR YOU TO SEE THE EPISODE IN ITS ENTIRETY BUT PURELY FOR THE SAKE OF MY POINT, THAT SOUTH PARK RULES OVER ALL, HERE IS THE END OF THE EPISODE. ENJOY.
IN THIS EPISODE WE FIND SCOTT TENORMAN, AN EIGHT GRADER, TRICKING CARTMAN OUT OF HIS MONEY, OUTSMARTING HIM, TO WHERE CARTMAN BECOMES SO ENRAGED HE VOWS REVENGE. SCOTT FIRST HUSTLES CARTMAN OUT TEN DOLLARS,BY SELLING HIM PUBIC HAIR, THEN ANOTHER SIX DOLLARS AND SOME ODD CENTS, THEN SENDS HIM ON A BUS RIDE, THEN FOILS EVERY ATTEMPT CARTMAN MAKES TO GET EVEN. OF COURSE, IT WOULD BE BETTER FOR YOU TO SEE THE EPISODE IN ITS ENTIRETY BUT PURELY FOR THE SAKE OF MY POINT, THAT SOUTH PARK RULES OVER ALL, HERE IS THE END OF THE EPISODE. ENJOY.
Friday, July 23, 2010
Twenty one or The Holy Ballsack.
In the beginning of me was my father, and my father told me stories, and behold! I laughed. There then came a time when I felt that my father was not so funny, at least not so funny as he once was, and I left my house, forsaking my father, who was sometimes funny, and my mother, who never was, to seek out the prophet Karagiozi, of which the Lord had spoken of. Now Aristophanes begot Karagiozi who begot
Harry Klynn, who begot Tzimi Panousi who begot AMAN! (ta katharmata!) And Aman! (ta katharmata!) died. And together they had lived two thousand four hundred and twenty five years. Now Aristohanes had begotten many children, of whom some were Roman, and they weren't funny at all. So the Lord God Aristophanes appeared to me in a dream and said, "Behold and look to the west for four fourths shall make you whole, an asshole or one (and he laughed)," and I was much confused. So I set out, to find the one, He spoke of, for I had no eyes to see, and no ears to hear, and was pretty fucking perplexed, like you are now I'd bet. And many cried the praises of many false prophets, like actors, especially Will Ferrell, who nay has played noone but himself in all his movies(think Arnold Schwarzenegger). And suddenly I was asleep when a bright light blinded me, and scales fell from my eyes, and I fell to the ground in fear, crying Lord! Lord! what is this?! do not forsake me! and four boys got off four horses, but where really Big Wheels and picked me up saying, Dude, get up! Hey man, are you ok? Ntouth, vrew avrewt? and Pull yourself together hippie! But I fled in fear and joy, to which, the fat one replied, screw you guys, I'm going home. Amen.
Harry Klynn, who begot Tzimi Panousi who begot AMAN! (ta katharmata!) And Aman! (ta katharmata!) died. And together they had lived two thousand four hundred and twenty five years. Now Aristohanes had begotten many children, of whom some were Roman, and they weren't funny at all. So the Lord God Aristophanes appeared to me in a dream and said, "Behold and look to the west for four fourths shall make you whole, an asshole or one (and he laughed)," and I was much confused. So I set out, to find the one, He spoke of, for I had no eyes to see, and no ears to hear, and was pretty fucking perplexed, like you are now I'd bet. And many cried the praises of many false prophets, like actors, especially Will Ferrell, who nay has played noone but himself in all his movies(think Arnold Schwarzenegger). And suddenly I was asleep when a bright light blinded me, and scales fell from my eyes, and I fell to the ground in fear, crying Lord! Lord! what is this?! do not forsake me! and four boys got off four horses, but where really Big Wheels and picked me up saying, Dude, get up! Hey man, are you ok? Ntouth, vrew avrewt? and Pull yourself together hippie! But I fled in fear and joy, to which, the fat one replied, screw you guys, I'm going home. Amen.
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
Twenty or this is going to be a short entry.
So this is going to be a short entry. I dedicate this entry to Maria and Pete. I was guilted by one, queued by the other. Lucky you, dear reader, (singular) I'm definitely not going to write about my day. That's kind of boring. It was long and it was hot, the end. I will say this. I regret not punching that guy on the train in the face. The pussy, with his gay middle eastern scarf poseur hip bullshit. I'm so original, yeah- you and the 200 other people with the same scarf walking around Manhattan. Dweeb. I should have hit him and just gone to jail. Would have been totally worth the satisfaction. Hmmm maybe not. Can't think of anything else right now. Too tired. Need sleep. Next post I'll write something meaningful and full of SUBSTANCE, maybe flying spaghetti monster?? Noone knows. :)
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